Anniversary Post: Our Story
Today is our fourth anniversary. In honor of that, we’re talking about our “story”. If that doesn’t sound your thing, we lovingly invite you to skip it and consider yourself dead to us.
The title of our love story could be: Boy Meets Girl. Girl Dates a Bunch of Other People. Boy Moves Out of State. Girl Dates a Bunch of Other People. Boy Moves Back to Town. Girl Dates a Bunch of Other People. Girl Wonders Where the Men Who Don’t Suck Are. Boy is All, “Hi R U Blind?” Girl is Like, “Ya.” Boy is All, “Get it Together”. Girl is Like, “K”.
It wasn’t a whirlwind romance. We didn’t get married in a fever, hotter than a pepper sprout or sprout of any other persuasion. We hemmed and hawed and waited and weighed and considered and reconsidered. We will they-ed and won’t they-ed, we “love me”-d and “love-me-not”-ed. We even did the thing where we talked each other through relationship problems with other people.
Jordan: Four or five years of that, plus two years of dating and a one-year engagement…let’s just say we took our time.
Joe: Speak for yourself. You know that feeling, right? When you meet someone and you don’t really know why yet, but you’re immediately like, “all I know is that I need some more of this person in my life”? Meeting Jordan was like that.
We met in 2007, right as Jordan was about to move to Nashville, because she was – you guessed it – dating someone who lived there. By the time that ended, about a year later, Joe was considering leaving Nashville and moving to Austin.
Jordan: I remember sitting across from him one night in my 2008 Civic – outside a tattoo parlour? Had we taken someone to get a tattoo? And then decided not to go in with them for some reason? Are we bad friends? – helping him weigh the pros and cons of making the move and downplaying how sad I’d be if he left.
We still have that car. I still get to sit in it, across from him, making jokes and weighing pros and cons.
Joe: I don’t remember that.
Joe did eventually move to Austin, with Jordan’s encouragement – the first adventure she ever talked me into – but we kept in touch via the majesty that was (is?) Facebook Messenger.
Joe: One thing I’ve learned about Jordan is that if you’re her people, she will stand by you, always. And she will make the effort to remind you that you’re her people…even if you’re a thousand miles away. It’s a quality I aspire to and the one that allowed us to remain friends, even when we weren’t in the same city.
When Joe moved back to Nashville in 2010, Jordan was – you guessed it – dating someone else. The “someone elses” came and went, and there was maybe a year where we’d sometimes see each other, enjoy it, and then forget about it.
Jordan: Every once in a while, I would think to myself, “Joe fucking rules”. Here and there a friend might suggest that we’d be good together. Sometimes I thought I’d seen a faint glimmer of crush flash across his face.
But here’s the truth: I think, in the quietest moment of solitude, I knew that if I acknowledged any romantic feelings toward Joe, what I’d find with him would be way more major than I was ready for.
So, I did what all twenty year-olds do when they are feeling something they’re uncomfortable with: I ignored it and made tons of counter-intuitive decisions.
Joe: It took us both a while to realize what was going on, I think. But there was no pressure, no awkwardness. Just good friends falling in love a little at a time.
Here we are in 2008, definitely not thinking about dating:
Jordan: One day, I texted him that I was craving ice cream. Twenty minutes later, I got a text: “Come outside”.
My chariot was a black Jeep Wrangler with no top and no doors – which was not going to be a good situation for my hair but I was willing to ignore that and appreciate the very suave and altogether uncharacteristic gesture – with a very cool, casually wind-blown Joe behind the wheel. And we ate ice cream. I think? I actually don’t remember. Anyway, that was in 2011.
Joe: Oh, yeah, I did do that! I am the fucking man.
Three years to the day later, we had our wedding send-off in that Jeep. No top, no doors, and enough hairspray to bleach a coral reef:
We’ve managed to squeeze a lot into seven years together. Joe went back to school and became a CPA. We’ve moved and then moved again and then moved a few more times because we’ve apparently decided that our life together should just be comprised of a series of packing and unpacking events until one or both of us is dead.
We got engaged at Christmas in 2013.
Jordan: Joe proposed to me at a big Christmas lights display in Nashville (not a surprise) and then had all of our friends waiting to celebrate with us at our apartment when we got back (huge surprise).
We bought a house. We changed jobs. We made friends. We got a dog. We traveled (and traveled and traveled and traveled).
When we got married (four years ago today), we made big promises and little promises, our favorites of which are these:
- To each do productive work at home and in the world
- To always approach the unknown with curiosity and joy
We promised each other adventure from the outset. And not in some rhetorical, whimsical “all life is an adventure” sort of way.
Jordan: Joe started trying to get me to move to Austin basically the second we started dating, and the ideas have only gotten bigger from there.
Pretirement isn’t just some random thing we decided to do. It’s something we vowed to do. It’s foundational. This is a promise kept.